Goldilocks was wondering lost, through the woods. She was tired, hungry, and she was frightened. Goldilocks came across a cabin and walked inside where she saw three bowls of porridge. She tasted one, it was too hot, tasted the next, too cold and then ate

the third, which was just right. She then walked upstairs and saw three beds. The first one was too hard, the second too soft and then she climbed in to the third one and fell fast asleep because it was just right.

There are many leadership interpretations about the meaning of this fairy-tale, but for me it’s all about personal leadership. As hungry and tired as she was, she trusted her intuition and her senses and made decisions that were right for her!

I refer to this concept in my coaching practice as The GOLDILOCKS ZONE: not too much, not too little, but just right, or as in my book The Gee Spot, Gee as GEE whiz, that moment when you make the connection and have that light bulb moment when something clicks or makes sense. It is that place of knowing deep inside you. In all contexts of decision making, communication, problem solving or as I call it, social and emotional fitness…. …. everybody’s body is different so only you can work out your own goldilocks zone or your Gee Spot. The hot porridge was just right for Papa Bear and the soft bed was just right for Mama Bear……so the secret is to know what is just right for you and … no one else can teach you how to be you!

Discovering your Goldilocks Zone or your Gee Spot is part of the journey starting with self-awareness, the foundation of Emotional Intelligence and the gateway to personal leadership. Autonomy is the means by which we have the freedom to make our own decisions and pursue a course of action in one's life. But without the skills, tools or knowledge, we have no confidence or courage to do so, and as adults we seem to doubt or need someone else to validate what we already know to be true. So we end up expecting and relying on others to provide the answers.

The problem with this, is that we all have our own unique fingerprint. We all have our own unique recipe, the thing that either gives us energy or zaps our energy. And we all know that it’s the ingredients, in the right quantity and quality, at the right time, that make the recipe work.

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